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In favour of being SO EXTRA (sometimes it’s cool not to play it cool)

Do you hear the words, “Oh my God you’re SO EXTRA!” more often than your name? Do you start each week vowing to control your OTT behaviour, only to get to Wednesday and turn back into a human meme? Well, my fellow drama queens, that’s OK. In fact, it’s more than OK; it’s downright fabulous.

You see, I might keep them under wraps 75% of the time, but I definitely have ‘so extra’ tendencies. Case in point: wearing a dress with my own face on it to my 21st birthday party – and the fun didn’t end there, oh no. I then changed into a black leotard and gold glove for a surprise solo performance of Beyoncé’s Single Ladies dance. Yep, I watched way too many episodes of My Super Sweet 16 growing up, but there’s no shame in that.

In fact, being extra could be the antidote to a world where we’re too often taught it’s cool to play it cool. In relationships (“don’t text back too quickly!”), fashion (“why does she always try so hard?”) or in social situations (“ugh, she’s just so LOUD!”), we’re always being told not to care too much or show our excitement too easily. Whether they realise it or not, unapologetically extra gals are actually paving the way for their fellow females to speak up for themselves, and to do, say or dress as they please without judgement.

Take Beyoncé, for example (can you tell I’m obsessed?). Whenever she has an important announcement to make, be it a tour or the birth of her twins, does she just send out a tweet or a statement from her spokesperson? Indeed she does not. There’s a full-blown Instagram photo shoot every time, with the first snap of her baby twins garnering over 10 million likes to date.

Sir Carter and Rumi 1 month today. 🙏🏽❤️👨🏽👩🏽👧🏽👶🏾👶🏾

A post shared by Beyoncé (@beyonce) on

Not that it’s about the ‘likes’, of course; quite the opposite. Being truly extra means giving zero cares as to what others think of your decisions. It’s all about what YOU want to wear, say, do and project onto the world, without actually needing their approval. It’s about the dress code being casual, and you turning up in sweats with six-inch heels and stacks of jewellery. You’re not being rude, that’s just how you chose to interpret ‘casual’.

There’s a level of self-awareness that comes with being extra, too, which Rihanna demonstrates perfectly. “When you a plus 1 but squad wanna come,” she captioned a recent Instagram photo of her, hairstylist Yusef Williams, personal assistant Jenn Rosales and BFF/photographer Melissa Forde. Yes, RiRi was being extra with her entourage, but she owned it. “Spam,” is another of her favourite captions, for when she posts five frames of a red carpet or shoot instead of one – classic extra behaviour.

when you a plus 1 but squad wanna come

A post shared by badgalriri (@badgalriri) on

Being in on the ‘extra’ joke is all part of the fun. While in my day-to-day life I’m generally limited to wearing head-to-toe sequins or using more superlatives than a Kardashian, I live for the moments when I can let out my inner Paris Hilton, the queen of extra behaviour. And Paris, like Rihanna, is 100% in on the lols. Heck, she’s even taken to reposting memes that use pictures of her as the punchline, so aware is she of her own OTT behaviour.

Yas Queen! 👸🏼

A post shared by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

So, next time someone calls you ‘extra’, embrace it. If it’s good enough for Queen Bey, Rih and Paris, it’s good enough for you.

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Image: Scream Queens

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