Wake up and smell the JOY, everybody. These are the happiest smells in the world, according to us. 

1. Freshly cut grass.

2. Waffles*.

3. Birthday cake candles.

4. Old bookshops.

5. The bakery section of the supermarket, specifically when the maple pecan twists are still warm.

6. A newborn baby’s head.

7. Baby lotion (easier than having the baby).

8. Toast. Why does toast smell so delicious? Nobody knows.

9. Really cold, crisp, frosty winter mornings.

10. The coffee you buy to warm your hands up on the cold, crisp, frosty morning.

11. The old school radiator you eventually warm up your arse against on the cold, crisp, frosty morning.

12. New carpets.

13. The first sun cream application of the year.

14. Candyfloss at a funfair. But pre-waltzers only. 

15. Whatever fancy stuff your hairdresser mists over you at the end of a haircut, then tries to get you to buy as though perhaps you are a secret Jenner. Nice try, lady.

16. The faint whiff of your mum’s perfume on a jumper while you’re secretly homesick on a school residential holiday.

17. Cinnamon buns. Obviously.

18. Bonfire night.

19. The first (successful) barbecue of summer.

20. Frying bacon on a Saturday morning. Or any morning.

21. Um, the vegetarian equivalent of bacon. Frying tofu? Sure. 

22. The distinctly nostalgic blend of PVA glue, poster paint, disinfectant and pencil sharpenings that fragrances every primary school ever.

23. Beyoncé. We imagine. 

*Of course, it is the law that they must always smell at least 30% better than they actually taste. The law.

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Image: Manjit Thapp

The whole back to school thing is always weird – you’re excited to see all your friends again, but not excited to actually be back in classes. You want this term to be different, but also kinda the same. But no matter how your first week back went, you’ve probably thought some of these things at one point or another.

1. I’m going to wake up half an hour earlier so I can do yoga before school.

2. Oh, but it’s so warm under my duvet.

3. I’m just going to snooze my alarm once.

4. Fine, twice.

5. Three times is my absolute maximum.

6. Crap, now I’m late.

7. The fourth snooze may have been a mistake.

8. Oh well, surely sleeping is more relaxing than bending my body in weird directions and trying not to fart.

9. Has school always started this early?

10. Oww, Caroline got one of those Bardot fringes I want.

11. So did Stacey.

12. And Hannah.

13. Maybe I don’t want one now that everyone has one.

14. Nah, I definitely still want one.

15. The thing I miss most about holidays is having constant access to the fridge.

16. This term, I’m not going to eat my lunch at morning break.

17. Fine, I will today but only because I’m starving. Tomorrow, I’ll definitely save my lunch until lunch time.

18. I’m so tired. I’m used to my daily nap.

19. You should be able to nap at school like you can in pre-school.

20. Woah. There’s something different about Sam – is it the clothes? The skin? The hair?

21. Who cares – Sam is now officially HOT.

22. Ohmigod. Sam just smiled at me so I don’t even care that it’s lunch time and all I have left is a measly apple and a muesli bar.

23. Damnit. Katie got the same backpack as me for Christmas. Now we’re going to look weird when we walk next to each other.

24. I hope she doesn’t think I copied her.

25. Maybe she copied me.

26. HOME TIME! I’m getting into my pyjamas immediately and turning on Netflix.

27. Urgh, I forgot I had homework to do.

28. What sort of evil teacher gives people homework the first week back?! Aren’t we suffering enough?

29. Maybe I’ll do some yoga instead.

30. *PARP*

31. That fart was so loud our neighbours might have heard it.

32. Yep, I was right, sleep is definitely more relaxing.

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

1. “It’s just like a big roast dinner!”

The calm, nonchalant words of your mum or dad the morning they start on Christmas dinner.

2. WHY AREN’T THE POTATOES BROWNING?! I TOLD YOU TO TURN THE OVEN OFF/UP/DOWN/INSIDE OUT (delete as appropriate) NOW EVERYTHING’S RUINED

The harassed, furious and screeching words of your now red-faced, vein-popping parent as D-time approaches, emitted at an ear drum-bursting volume. Cue kitchen exodus.

3. “I’ll get the drinks.”

Said by whichever parent isn’t cooking, as they grab the wine bottle and exit the kitchen in reverse.

4. “Well, it IS Christmas.”

First heard at 10am (along with the Buck’s Fizz cork), then throughout the course of the day whenever the bottle, chocolate box or brandy cream passes.

5. “GO ON. It’s Christmas!”

Said jovially to anyone who does not subscribe to the above rule.

6. “Take it in turns, please”

An order totally ignored by you and your siblings as you tear through your stockings with all the ferocity of a Tasmanian Devil – whether you’re 5 or 15.

7. “Now it’s mummy’s/daddy’s/auntie’s/grandma’s (delete as appropriate) turn”

Cue the giving and receiving of a gift so eye-wateringly dull (cycling gloves, garden trowel, tights) it provides an immediate reminder that growing up sucks, in almost every possible way.

8. “Hurry up, or we’ll miss the Queen’s speech!”

There’s always someone so desperate to watch the Queen’s speech they’ll insist on bolting down Christmas pudding at a speed you know will come back to haunt them later. To the amusement and/or total indifference of everyone else.

9. “But I thought you’d grown out of Advent calendars?”

Every year they ask it, as if you would ever grow out of something as exciting as legitimately eating chocolate at 8am.

10. “Sorry it’s not a chocolate one”

When, finally, they remember to get you an Advent calendar – and they completely miss the WHOLE POINT. 

11. “But I thought you’d grown out of stockings?”

May the gods defend you from ever hearing these dreaded words, which it’s almost impossible to defend yourself against without sounding just that teeny bit spoilt. It was fun while it lasted, but that, my friend, is Santa calling time on your fun.

12. “What do you want for Christmas?”

Your mum* will have already asked this. Your dad will ask you around the 22 December, with all the wide-eyed innocence of a middle aged man who’s only just realised Christmas is happening. 

*Or vice versa, obviously. Christmas is no excuse for gender stereotypes.

13. “Are you sure that will fit in the hall, darling?”

The doubtful parent, or whoever it is that’s responsible for putting up the Christmas tree at the garden centre when the other one feels a competitive, almost primal drive to purchase the tallest tree going.

14. “There’s no way that’s going to fit.”

When you get the tree home.

15. “It’s okay, I’ll just saw the top off.”

[three hours pass]

16. “WHOSE ******* IDEA WAS THIS? I SWEAR TO GOD, WE ARE GETTING A FAKE ONE NEXT YEAR.”

When sawing the extra four feet off has left needles where needles ought never to go, and inevitably leaves the tree bald.

17. “Did you keep the receipt?”

There’s always at least one present in the pile exchanged between partners that falls short of expectations. Short of lying, this is usually considered to be the most tactful response.

18. “Don’t worry, I kept the receipt!”

Said by an anxious parent when giving pretty much any present, whether it’s a pair of suspect heels or some rollerball pens.

19. “It’s dry. It’s dry, isn’t it? Dry as a bone. I knew it would be dry.”

The cook, upon the serving of the Christmas dinner.

20. “Do you need picking up?”

Said with a heavy sigh when you declare your intention to go to your mate’s Christmas party.

21. “I can’t pick up yerup darling. I’vad too much tdrink. Walkorgerra cab.”

Said in a sleepy, rolling slur when you ring them at 10pm

22. “Have you written your thank you letters?”

Every day between Christmas and New Year.

23. “Are you sure you meant these for me, mum?”

Your mum to your grandma upon unwrapping a bumper pack of men’s thermal vests.

24. “No I did NOT make the Christmas pudding. Who do you think I am, Jesus?”

The parent who cooked Christmas dinner to the parent who didn’t cook Christmas dinner when the latter asks innocently if the pudding is home made.

25. “Has anyone seen the matches? Where are the matches? The pudding’s getting cold!”

Birthdays and Christmas. Literally the only time humans ever need matches anymore. No wonder they can never find them.

26. “It won’t light. Why won’t it light? Give me another match, I’ll just GAH GAH GAHHH.”

Lighting the brandy on the Christmas pud. And maybe burning the tree offcuts. 

@finney_clare

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

A new beauty look! What could be simpler? Oh right – everything, everything is simpler… 

OK, make-up gods. You’d better be up there. And you’d better actually be listening this time.

‘Cos last time I tried a new look – you know, that time I drew on freckles and was immediately escorted to the school nurse with suspected chicken pox – I don’t feel like you exactly had my back.

I mean, you could have sent me some kind of sign that using mum’s dark red lipliner instead of forking out for a brown eyeliner would definitely NOT be totally fine. I can only assume you were off watching Netflix or something.

So, pay attention this time. Because I am about to attempt something REVOLUTIONARY with my face. And this time it’s going to be amazing.

I’ve got two whole hours before Jamie’s party, a tonne of YouTube tutorials loaded, T-Swift on for support. What could possibly go wrong?

I mean, yeah, there’s the teeny, tiiiiiinyyyy, not-even-a-real-issue-really issue of not having any of the right products or tools. But hey, I’m in the Girl Guides. And who was it that fixed Anna’s skirt right before school photos with only a paper clip and some chewing gum? If there’s one thing I know how to do, it’s improvise. By the time I’m done, this face is going to look so beyond on fleek they’re going to have to come up with a new hashtag just for me.

And if not, well… mucking about with all this stuff for a couple of hours is more fun than what’s going downstairs. Wonder how long Mum is going to last teaching Great Granny to do internet banking before she hurls the laptop out of the window? LOVE that she turned up with her swimming cossie, in case surfing the web involved actual surfing.

Wonder how long it’d take mum to hurl Great Granny out the window if she could pick her up?

So, anyway… what to try?

Maybe an Arianna Grande cat-eye flick? Hmmm but then I’d feel like I had to copy the rest of her look too. And where am I going to get that many hair extensions at this time on a Saturday afternoon?

And, I mean, she rocks it and everything, but is it just me that thinks she looks a liiittle bit like she’s stolen an actual pony’s tail and stitched it to her head? How does her tiny head even support that kind of weight?

Nope. I don’t have the neck muscles to deal with that all night. Especially when I’m going to be pulling some seriously killer dance moves. So maybe… Ooh! Bronze smoky eye with glowy skin. Perfect.

Man this is going to look so awesome. Am going to need to plan a suitably dramatic entrance.

OK, so foundation. Don’t have any of that. Good start. Tinted moisturiser will have to do.  

Hmmm it doesn’t say anything about glowy on it.

*Searching through make up bag*

Maybe my entrance could involve someone wheeling me in on an exercise bike like Arianna in the Side to Side video.

Glowy… glowy….

AHA! I have a glitter lip balm! And glittery is kind of glowy. Mix a bit of those two together on the back of my hand…

(I am soooo profesh mixing stuff on the back of my hand. Tanya Burr would be super proud.)

And… VOILA! Glowy foundation! OK, apply with a damp beauty blender sponge. Don’t have one of those either.

I reckon a washing up sponge cut into the shape of an egg would probs work? OK, off I go. Right, no sponges. A dish cloth will have to do.

Hmmm… that doesn’t really seem like enough coverage. Not really getting the ‘glow’ factor…  Second layer I reckon…

Should probably take my makeup bag along to the party. Everyone is going to want in on this look once they– WOAH! OK. Second layer was a mistake.

Definitely a mistake.

Look like a glittery alien. Great.

Although… kind of an AWESOME glittery alien on second thoughts. I’m sort of… rocking this! Who knew? OK – glittery alien foundation stays!

Eyebrows. Urgh. Still can’t do mine without them looking like deranged caterpillars. Alright Michelle Phan. Where’s your ‘Mastering the art of Eyebrows’ video?

How can she be so weird yet so mesmerising at the same time? It’s that voice… she’s like some beautiful sparkly robot from outer space. Oh my god Michelle Phan is a glittery alien too! KNEW I was a trendsetter!

NO, FOCUS! Eyebrows. So a light hand is key, appazza.

Deep breath.

Light hand.

Deep breath.

Light ha- actually, do you know what? They’re fine. They’re FINE as they are!

Eyes. Wonder if Jamie has an exercise bike at his house somewhere? And if there’s anyone who’d be willing to be one of my roll-er-in-er-ers.

How has an hour gone already?! Urgh. This was supposed to be fun. If it takes any more than ten minutes from now I’m having a pre-party dance session instead. So. ‘Sweep a light gold colour all of over the lid with a flat brush’.

Ok. I have a brush….

*Hits it a few times with a school textbook*

A flat brush! So… sweeping… sweeping… perfect! I am basically NikkieTutorials.

‘Blend a darker bronze colour into the socket line’. OK, this shimmery brown I got free with that magazine will do. Blending blending blending…

(Wonder if people still get scouted on the street to become models? Shame mum’s driving me to Jamie’s. Otherwise I’d defo get stopped).

Blending blendi– ARGH!! Abort blending! ABORT BLENDING!! Too much brown!! Noooo! Glittery PANDA alien? That’s a bit too far, even for a trendsetter like me.

OK don’t panic. Think. What would the Pixiwoos do? THINK!! No wait, don’t think – YouTube it. The modern way.

Face wipes! Of course! Like wondrous, aloe vera-scented time machines! There we are. Like nothing ever happened.

OK so let’s just leave the leftover goldy bit there and slap some mascara on. Mascara I can do.

Well look at that. Pretty damn fierce if you ask me.   

But the girl in this picture has such cute freckles… NO. Put the lipliner DOWN. Maybe some statement red lippy?

Ok… Slow and steady… slow and stead–  ARGH!

Why did anyone create little brothers?! And how do they always know the worst possible time to burst into your room waving a plastic weapon? Should definitely have intercepted the brother-making process somehow.

BLEURGH! Have just realised what that would involve and now cannot unsee it.

And now I’ve got a stupid clown mouth, too. And it’s lip stain. It’s never coming off. Total DISASTER.

Unless…

I mean it could work… it TOTALLY could…

Watch out world! Here comes my amazing new look: glittery alien meets Miranda Sings.

Nailed it.

little girl in makeup

@LucindaEverett

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Hey, it’s better to give it a break anyway… probably

1. Oh god it is too early for any human to be awake. Why did Yesterday Me think Today Me would want to get up at this time and wash her hair? Was she deluded?

2. Let’s assess the damage. Maybe this is the point where it supposedly starts conditioning itself? Maybe it’ll look magically fresh and elegantly dishevelled and I can go back to sleep!

3. Please let it look magically fresh and elegantly dishevelled.

4. Oh.

5. How can pillows cause so much chaos when they are so soft and lovely? Did I accidentally sleep in a hedge without realising?

6. No. No, I’d have scratches from the… twigs.

7. It’s fiiine, it’s just a little bit rumpled. Those kinks will probably drop right out.

8. Who am I kidding, my roots look like a mountain range. I could have tiny groups of people doing their Duke of Edinburgh Award on my head.

9. But there is one simple, easy solution! WET IT DOWN.

10. WET

11. IT

12. DOWN.

13. There we go, all wetted. I look great. I look slick. I look like Chrissy Teigen crossed with Lucius Malfoy. Although of course I can’t go back to bed now because my head is wet and the pillow will make it worse, so nice one genius.

14. It’s fine, I’ll wait for it to dry while making a nutritious breakfast and catching up on current affairs.

15. JK, I’m going to scroll through Instagram with one eye open for the exact length of time it would have taken to wash my hair anyway.

16. Ok it still looks wet. Is it still wet… or just greasy? Please let it be wet.

17. Nup. Grease.

18. Brilliant. Brilliant. And now I don’t have time to wash it anyway, so I guess this is the hair we’re going with today. Brilliant.

19. Thank god for dry shampoo though. How did anyone cope in the days when shampoo only came wet?

20. Hats. That was what hats were for.

21. Right, just a modest spritz and my head will be fresh as a daisy again. Just a leeeetle bit.

22. And a leeetle bit more…

23. …and a leetle bit mo- oh right, too much and now I look like the ghost of Christmas past. I am Moaning Myrtle. I am Mary Berry’s Victoria sponge cake.

24. Although a Victoria sponge cake probably involves less grease, tbh.

25. Brush it through! It’s fiiiiine, just massage it in with your fingers like they tell you to on the can, then brush it out. Keep brushing. And a bit more.

26. And a bit more.

27. Maybe if I wet it down again?

28. NO.

29. Right, roots looking better. Still a bit dusty. But that’s ok, that’s just… vintage-inspired. ‘Heritage’, they’d probably call it in Vogue. I have heritage hair. I am very on-trend. I will be like one of those aristocratic models who is too cool and posh and bohemian to be clean.

30. It’s better for your hair not to wash it anyway! Everyone knows that. Unless that’s one of those lies people tell themselves, like ‘actually fruit is worse for you than a burger’. 

31. Now I must tackle the weird twisty bits and flat bits. I could do this the sensible and careful way, by using a suitable protector spray and easing them out with my hairdryer on a moderate heat. Or I could do them the lazy way, by battering them with my hair straighteners until they behave.

32. My poor hair. I am terrible to my hair. I wouldn’t blame it if one day it just got up and left me.

33. *whisper* Please don’t leave me, hair.

34. Is that… toast? Is someone making me toast?

35. Nope, that is my hair burning. That’s the delicious waft of baked human proteins, that is. Blech.

36. Should I just sack it all off and put it up? A messy bun, that’ll solve everything! Praise be to the messy bun! I should have done this right from the beginning.

37. Well, it’s definitely messy. I have ticked that box. But it’s not exactly messy the way that messy buns are on Pinterest, is it? It’s less like lovely voluminous #croissanthair and more like a kind of… partially digested teacake.

39. May as well whack a bit of serum on, see if that’ll help. And some salt spray. And a tiny bit more dry shampoo.

40.

41. Hats. This is what hats are for.

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Image: Katie Edmunds

Ok, everyone knows your period is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s a perfectly natural – if sometimes irritating – part of life.

However, as natural and wonderful and empowering as your period might be, very few of us want to bellow “HIYA I’M MENSTRUATING” at our friends when we’re walking down the road. So in case you find them useful, we asked 38 women for their favourite period euphemisms. You are welcome.

1. Aunt Flo

2. Surfing the crimson wave

3. Ladies’ week

4. Mr P

5. Nature’s mess

6. Menzies

7. Josie’s visiting – ”My Mum always said Josie’s visiting. Then it became just Josie. Never managed to make friends with any women called Josie – too many associations”

8. On the blob

9. Shark week

10. The moon sickness

11.Me and my friends have long referred to it as our ‘pez’. ‘Can’t go swimming today I’m on my pez’ or sometimes ‘pezza’, or ‘the ol’ pezza’.”

12. A Leona situation (ie. bleeding love)

13. Happy-fun-lady-time!

14. “I liked it when Tina Fey referred to it as ‘Aunt Blood'”

15. Having the painters in

16. Falling to the communists

17. Pez dispenser

18. “At my school girls say they’re ‘flying’. Because of the wraparound wings.”

19. Molly has come to visit

20. “My four-year-old sister calls it ‘nappy week'”

21. Rag week

22. Code red

23. Arsenal are playing at home

24. “My boyfriend and I refer to it as ‘my curse’ as a tongue-in-cheek reference to what men called it in the olden days”

25. The Red Sea is flowing

26. “My boyfriend calls it ‘Hanna time’”

27. Lunar flow

28. Ordering ‘l’omelette rouge’

29. Aunt Irma’s in town

30. Bloody Mary

31. Flowers

32. Dracula’s teabag

33. Lucifer’s waterfall

34. Reboot

35. Having your fairies

36. Hiding from Joffrey

37. Bernard

And my absolute, absolute favourite.

38. My Dolmio Day.

Mmm.

@orbyn

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Image: Hailey Hamilton

Despite using calendars and tracking apps, I’m not always absolutely sure when my menses is on the way. Sometimes it takes me by surprise. I’ll be out minding my own business and suddenly be aware of a… dampening.

You know, the curious, sticky sensation that makes you worry that not only has your period turned up by surprise, but it’s also making the sort of entrance that RuPaul might deem too flamboyant for Drag Race.

When that happens, here’s what’s going through my mind. And your mind. Probably.

1. Gosh, my bum feels sweaty! Maybe it’s these tights…

2. Or…

3. Oh no, oh no, oh no!

4. There must be PINTS of blood down there already. Enough to fill a milk bottle! Or a Coke bottle! How can I sneak out and deal with this?

5. Just going to check on the App store to see if there’s anything in teleportation.

6. They have an app that tells you, TO THE SECOND, when it’s going to stop raining, but not one that will magic me from my chair to the toilet. MODERN TECHNOLOGY IS POINTLESS.

7. When I get up, the force of the blood is going to lift me straight to the ceiling. Like I’m sitting on a bust fire hydrant. As if I’m starring in a remake of Do The Right Thing meets Carrie.

8. I’m wearing white pants. Why would I ever wear white pants? Why do I even own white pants?

9. I bet it’s all over my jeans.

10. I bet it’s over the chair.

11. How can I get period blood off a chair without anyone noticing? Will I have to break into the building at night with a tub of Vanish, and tights over my head?

12. I wonder if I can slide my hand under my bum and check how bad the damage is.

13. It’s got through! It’s happened! It’s… oh, it’s a bit of pink felt tip.

14. Maybe I could drop to my knees and silently roll across the floor, like an unseen ninja, and the force of my propelling body would stop the blood from gushing everywhere.

15. Or I’ll get stuck with my rear end in the air and give everyone a prolonged view of my blood-soaked crotch.

16. Can I slowly, slowly edge to the side of the room, and then scuttle out sideways like a crab? I think I can.

17. I don’t have any tampons on me. Or change for the machine. I could message someone when I’m there… but my phone has 8 per cent battery.

18. I guess I’ll just have to live in the toilet.

19. Right, up and clench, and clench. Channel the crab, the menstrual icon of the sea. You’re on a mission to the other side of the seabed, defending your pearls…. ah, no, that might be oysters.

20. This must be good for my bum, all the clenching. Maybe I’ll patent this technique as an exercise movement. I could be Instagram famous! The Period Power Workout!

21. Phew. Safe in the toilet. Now to face the mess, clean up, and… oh.

Just a sweaty bum after all, then.

Kermit the Frog screaming gif

@NotRollergirl

Image: Kate Forster

It happens to the best of us – we fill our drawers, bags, pockets and cabinets with everything we need to prepare for our periods, but every so often we get caught out, just because it’s a couple of days early, we’re not at home and we’re wearing the wrong coat. Here’s what goes through our minds, once we’ve finished silently screaming “Noooooooo!”

1. WHY? Why am I so disorganised? My life would be so different if I remembered, and got up before 7AM to make healthy lunch salads, and liked herbal tea more than hot chocolate, and meditated. Why don’t I sew them inside the lining of my jacket? Like they probably did during the war?

2. Actually, what did they use during war time? Were they rationed?

3. Were they…knitted? I suppose they’d be quite easy to knit. You’d unpick your husband’s suits, while he was away fighting, making do, being brave on the home front…

4. Urghhhh. The chafing, though.

5. It’s probably not long until we can have them airlifted to us, by drone, the second we need them. I am not disorganised. I am merely evolving slightly ahead of technology.

6. Still, that would be a bit awkward, the sound of a very noisy drone flying overhead while you’re in the loo. Although the person pooing in the next cubicle might be grateful.

7. I can picture the lovely tampons in my bathroom. A whole, fresh packet, singing with availability and newness! Maybe I can teleport one here using the power of my mind. Like Matilda.

8. So I am not Matilda. Still, it is better to be slightly uncomfortable and not have magical powers than to have superhuman abilities, horrible parents and a headmistress who might lock me in a spiky cupboard.

9. Imagine getting your period in The Chokey. The period would probably be frightened back into your uterus.

10. I really fancy some of Bruce Bogtrotter’s cake, though.

11. It’s OK, I just need to do a crab scuttle to the toilets and use wadded up loo roll. Although didn’t that girl from Year 11 have a cousin who did that at a festival and got toxic shock syndrome?

12. Oh, no, she was the one who had six cans of Red Bull and tried to run up the side of a Portaloo.

13. I wonder whether I should get special knickers that would absorb the period, for emergencies like this.

14. Or a commode, like a Queen. If men had periods, Henry VIII would have invented something long ago that meant no-one had to get up or move for the entire week.

15. I’ll just check my pocket. I have 19 Polos, from six different packets, some old tissues and a broken bit of key ring.

16. Oooh, and a lip balm!

17. I don’t remember this lip balm, the packaging feels a bit odd. Actually, it feels a bit like…

18. Ah. Ahahahahahahaha! I knew I wasn’t that disorganised!

19. Quite glad I didn’t ruin the lining of my jacket, now I think about it.

@NotRollergirl

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

1. Are they walking towards me?

2. Does my breath smell?

3. Why did I have a tuna sandwich for lunch?

4. Why did I have a tuna sandwich ever? Tuna is the kryptonite of romance.

5. My arms feel weird.

6. Should I cross them?

7. Or just leave them by my sides?

8. Oh my god, what do I normally do with my arms?! WHY IS THIS SO HARD.

9. What should I say?

10. “Hey!”? Nope. Too American.

11. “Hi”? Too simple.

12. “Howdy?” Wait, am I suddenly in a 50s Western film?

13. Maybe I’ll just nod. Nodding says, “I acknowledge you exist, but your presence doesn’t make me want to run away to Spain with you and tattoo your name on my bicep or anything.” Nodding is cool. Right?

14. Right?!

15. Oh my god, they’re coming! No, no no – they’re right here.

16. “G’day partner, do your arms ever feel weird?”

17. Nailed it.

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Image: Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging

Ah, love. It’s a tricky bastard. Love means a million different things to a million different people, and sometimes it’s hard to tell if what you’re feeling is true love, intense like, a raging crush or just the first twinges of indigestion.

But sometimes, you just know. Shakespeare had his summer’s day, Jane Austen had her country dances… and we have the moment you decide to share your Netflix password. Here are some 2017 signs that you’re probably, definitely, in love.

1. You let them take the stamp for your coffee on their loyalty card.

2. You actually put your phone down when they talk to you.

3. You offer them the last slice of pizza.

4. …then they say, ‘No, you have it.’

5. You agree to see La La Land for a second time, even though musicals make you want to punch things.

6. Even Snapchat knows you’re together and puts two pink hearts next to their name.

7. You can share a tent at a festival in August for a whole four days and still be speaking to them at the end.

8. They let you practice everything you learned from Dr Pimple Popper on their chin.

9. You’ve felt a strange and overwhelming urge to give them your wifi code.

10. There are more strips of adorable photobooth pictures in your purse than actual cards or money.

11. Every meme they tag you in actually makes you laugh, not just like to be polite.

12. You have Instagram notifications turned on for them, even if they’re a six-nearly-identical-blurry-selfies-at-once person. Even then.

13. They are the very first person you WhatsApp “SNOW!!!!! ❄️☃️❄️☃️” to when it snows.

14. And sad faces to when it turns to rain three minutes later.

15. You know their exact Starbucks order, and recite it faithfully even when it’s embarrassingly long.

16. You look at them the way everyone looks at Beyoncé.

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Image: Amber Griffin

1. You promise to message and meet up all the time.

text-ok

2. You judge each other’s uniform.

Total idiot gif

3. They quickly find new friends and you get protective. How dare they.

Big Brother 'who is she?' gif

4. You stalk everyone involved in any second of your spare time.

Modern Family stalk gif

5. You debate joining a sports team just so you can go to their school and fight the new friends.

What team gif

6. Your best friend starts to change and you don’t like it. At all. You agreed Snapchat filters were overrated and now look! She’s wearing a flower crown!

Shady Real Housewives gif

7. The “Do you mind if so-and-so comes?” texts start to roll in and encroach on your BFF time.

She doesn't even go here gif

8. Your parents start to ask why you haven’t mentioned your best friend in ages.

fine I don't know gif

9. But then, suddenly, they turn up in your Facebook messages when something goes wrong. They need you and only you.

Best friend back

10. And you realise that no matter where you are, how you’ve changed, and what you’re doing, that’s just life and you’ll always be each other’s number one.

Flying hug gif

10a. (Fine, and the new friends are actually ok…)

Easy A screaming gif

@louisejonesetc

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

1. Five more minutes of TV and then I’ll start my homework

[Five minutes later…]

2. Damn, that went fast.

3. OK, another five minutes and I’ll go get my schoolbag.

[Another five minutes later…]

4. Is it scientifically possible to be glued to the sofa?

5. Like, this might be a genuine condition. I can’t move. Could I get a doctor’s note and not have to do my homework?

6. I’ll Google it.

7. Crap, left my phone in my schoolbag. Plan B…

8. “MUUUUMMM! CAN YOU GET MY SCHOOLBAG?”

9. Why is she ignoring me? It’s like she wants me to fail.

10. Maybe if I flick the channel I’ll find something as dull as double chemistry. That counts as homework, right?

11. The Big Bang Theory is basically science. That’ll do.

[Thirty minutes later…]

12. Just one more episode…

13. If Sheldon can track his bowel movements and still find a girlfriend then why am I single?

14. Maybe I’ll start tracking my bowel movements.

15. No, that would be gross.

16. Now I need to pee.

17. Picked up my schoolbag on the way back from the toilet because I’m a multi-tasking GENIUSSS.

18. *opens laptop* I’ll just check Facebook…

19. Wait, there’s a picture of Megan and Ollie kissing at the ice rink. Are they DATING?!

20. I can’t believe she didn’t tell me.

21. OMG I just tagged myself in their photo. Right on his mouth. DE-TAG DE-TAG.

22. Like, how did I even manage that?

23. I’ll never be able to show my face at school again.

24. Maybe I’ll run away to Japan and set up a cat cafe.

25. I could become a professional cat vlogger. Cat-ogger? A clogger?

26. Must come up with a better name.

27. Taylor Swift has good cat videos. I’ll just check her Instagram for research…

28. Her cats are travelling by private jet while I’m forced to sit at home doing algebra.

29. I wish I was a cat. Cats are so sassy.

30. If I was a cat I’d sit on my bed all day glaring at my human until it petted me.

31. But instead I’ve got homework to do. Where’s the justice?

32. I really should do my homework…

33. Just five more minutes.

Taylor Swift bored

@SusannaLazarus

It’s time you started celebrating your period, guys. Sign up to bettybox RN and get all your tampons and pads, beauty products, sweet treats and loads more cool stuff delivered to your door, every single month. We know. It’s totally awesome. 

Image: Hailey Hamilton